Editors Blog
Axl Rose / photo by George Chin
More on SPIN.com:
>> Guns N' Roses: Album Review and More News
>> Listen to Guns N' Roses' 'Chinese Democracy'
>> Guns N' Roses, 'Chinese Democracy'
>> Chuck Klosterman's 2006 review of Guns N' Roses, 'Chinese Democracy'
The Last 'Chinese Democracy' Blog Post Ever, Probably
Well, Guns N' Roses' opus is finally out. Now what the hell are we supposed to talk about? asks SPIN's Steve Kandell.
By Steve Kandell 11.24.08 9:38 AM
Axl Rose / photo by George Chin
I am an American born in the first half of the 1970s, with a penis. In other words, I saw The Phantom Menace the day it came out.
And while that's pretty much a universally derided piece of pop-cultural flotsam at this point, sitting through it that first night didn't feel uncomfortable or annoying or even disappointing. No, far worse: It didn't feel like anything.
More on SPIN.com:
>> Guns N' Roses: Album Review and More News
>> Listen to Guns N' Roses' 'Chinese Democracy'
>> Guns N' Roses, 'Chinese Democracy'
>> Chuck Klosterman's 2006 review of Guns N' Roses, 'Chinese Democracy'
Forced to compete against its own generation-defining legacy, the odds against the endeavor's success were impossibly stacked from the outset; the end result seemed less like a movie meant to forge a warm emotional bond with an audience weaned on its predecessors' iconography and vernacular than a state-of-the-art facsimile, engineered to stimulate familiarity-oriented sensory-response nerve centers. The only things more stilted and artificial than the computer-generated characters were the human ones. Also, it didn't make any fucking sense.
And we probably knew this would be the case before the house lights even dimmed, yet for 16 years, the specter of this movie -- the anticipation of it, the rumor-mongering and the hand-wringing -- was something that too many of us thought way too much about. So when the house lights back came up, even before the bitching and the bashing could begin, the hollow realization set in that even if the movie had been good, it still would have been less exciting than wondering if it would be good.
All of which brings us to Chinese Democracy.
Snuck anti-climactically into Best Buy stores (and, of course, torrent sites), the final product couldn't possibly live up to the 16 years' -- where have I heard that number before? -- worth of innuendo and legend surrounding its gestation. (To his credit, Axl himself has suggested as much, perhaps betraying his final tether to reality.)
The album is the aural equivalent of a CGI-stuffed blockbuster from Skywalker Ranch -- wall-to-wall explosions, but no real sense of danger. Bells and whistles and orchestras and pianos and dramatic crescendos abound on a litany of would-be epic songs -- November drizzles, all emoting, no emotion -- none of which are bad enough to be laughable or memorable enough to be a worthwhile payoff.
Fantasies of budget-busting 70-piece symphonies milling about in a studio foyer while Axl tends to his cornrows give way to the realization that this may well all be ProTools wankery. It all sounds quite a bit like Guns N' Roses, only…not quite. Everything you'd think you'd want to hear is present and accounted for, yet the music feels so precise and bloodless, polished and sanded down and polished again to a shiny nub. "Riad N' the Bedouins" -- does Axl get paid by the apostrophe? -- is a rare moment of relatively undercooked feistiness. But here's the rub: None of this matters a whit.
With Chinese Democracy now an honest-to-goodness Actual Thing, an album among many, many other albums, the cottage industry of writing about it in the abstract is, like so many other industries right now, being shuttered, its personnel scuttled and forced to find real work.
The only way the record could have lived up to its legend would have been to never come out at all; that it is instead merely, ultimately, a fair-to-middling rock album is nothing to get mad at. It isn't Axl Rose's fault you're not 15 and hearing "Welcome to the Jungle" for the first time, and the fact that he understands this and doesn't give a shit almost makes you forgive him for willfully stripping his band of the personality and soul and tension that made you care in the first place. Almost.
Like another wise fella done said, the waiting is the hardest part; but it's also the most fulfilling, offering mystery and wonder in a way that Actual Things rarely provide.
Dear Kevin Shields: Sell your 16-track. Let us dangle.
Watch: Guns N' Roses, "Welcome to the Jungle"
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Go Axel Rose. Great pics.
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MT Review of Chinese Democracy
Overall, way too much hype of this one! Can you believe that they would actually put someone in jail over "Chinese Democracy"? Hmmm ironic.
Well it is good to hear Axl again with something new. This is going to be one of those records in which you will have to hear numerous times to let it seep in past your bad blood for the years of waiting. But listening to it, it is around average, maybe a little bit better just because.
I think the album is average but since it is GNR I give it a little more props. Axl has his voice and keeps the dragging songs strong. If he wasn't in this band it would not be listened to. There are a few good tracks off this album but nothing impressive. I give it a 5 out of 10.
Track #
1. Chinese Democracy-
This has got to be the best song on this album. It has a really good vibe, great movement to the song and the solo rips all the way through. On a personal note I have found myself humming the melody of it, so it does has resonance and will hold up.
2. Shackler's Revenge-
This song has the groove that was needed to get on the air. A lot of weird guitar parts in it which sounds pretty good, a little over produced and not raw enough for that GNR feel. But it is pretty good, great hook in the chorus and Axl delivers at times which is pretty impressive.
Cont'd GNR Review
MT Review of Chinese Democracy
3. Better-
This must be the "girl getting song" off it. Can someone say November Rain but modernized with more guitar. I like this song and very catchy, good crunchy guitar and I think that pulls the song off. Good song! My compliments to the chef!
4. Street of Dreams-
Almost lost me at the beginning with the "November Rain part 2" sound with the piano. Axl really rips in this one. Great vocal range and at times can give you chills. Good song, the vocals rule in this one. And remember NR2 when you hear it.
5. If the World-
Wow, is that flamenco/salsa with a **** driven guitar in the background? I'll buy that. This song has a lot of sampling in it keep your ears out for it. I could hear this song in a lounge, but with a few long haired guitarist hiding in the background. It's probably the most dragging song on here.
6. There Was a Time-
Sampling starts this one again, a trend of whats to come? The songs drags but has a good hook in the chorus. The lyrics are really good. Good job on that.
7. Catcher In The Rye-
Ok piano again. Is this Axl's Beatles record? I am not feeling this song. It is too much like a Beatles song and not like a GNR song. Not sleazy enough, well there isn't any at all. La, la la la la,,, what the hell is that?
8. Scraped -
This song tries to pull it off pretty heavy but the intro doesn't se it up. I guess that is a good thing. This is a pretty good song. Good guitarwork in this one and the lyrics are superb and the hook is prevalent throughout the song. Meaning the verses are very strong as well as the chorus.
9. Riad n'The Bedouins-
Sampling starts this one. It is pretty blah throughout the whole song. The lyrics are really good. But it is just blah.
10. Sorry-
All you Pink Floyd fans should like this one. Give it a listen and you will think he got the backup band from PF. Axl keeps the song flowing, good vocals and midway the guitars pick up and saves the song. Yeah Pink Floyd all the way. Good mellow song with some good guitar riffs in there.
11. I.R.S.-
Samples start this one. This is about one of the best songs off this one, too bad it was leaked a few years back. Great song from beginning to end. Axl is right on target with this one and has some deep guitar that makes you think of Sabbath. I like that! Good solo also. Overall one of the best tracks off this one!
12. Madagascar-
Good song for a ballad on this one. Very catchy throughout and the vocals or on par. I like this one. Strong throughout the entire song and Axl put emotion into this song and it works. Great job.
13. This I Love-
Piano and Axl. Don't get me wrong this is a good song. Axl rules this song and it works. Very catchy feel to it. I am thinking Scorpions with this one. Get the lighters out for this one!! Good solo in it, great transition from the mellow and the Spanish feel to it. Good work on that part.
14. Prostitute-
Sampling starts it off. Mellow and a piano follows it. Transition throughout the song is superb. I enjoy this song. Definitely is not cruising music but it will relax you and take you through the journey that you were just in for with the album. Guitar solo was short but it needed it. Axl's voice is still strong and maintains this song.
So get your butt over to Best Buy and pick up a copy of it!
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